Arggh its stressing me out and making me a right miserable cow.
Usually i'm pretty good with money, until the beginning of this year and now im like brasic! spending above my means, it's my own fault ofcourse but i cant seem to sort it out...
Because if i did, then id have to spend a whole month not going out or doing anything. i think i might have to though.
It's like bloody hell! if i can't manage myself now, im going to be screwed in uni. I am determined not for that to happen!!!
I do owe money to my parents and my brother but its not a huge amount. im going to set up an online bank account so i can check my money often where its going etc.
it'll sort itself out, aslong as i make sure it does lol.
don't need the extra worry. exams are coming up. im going to do shite, like i did in the first lot

...In a sort of metaprocial sense of the word, meaning no offence ofcourse lol.
I think maybe it's becasue i worry so much, where certain things/people are concerned.
For example today;
I started worrying a little over something silly and trivial, then began to panic and then got paranoid and totally freaked out. Then i saw what i needed to see and everything was marvellous again.
:O It's so frustrating becasue i can see myself doing it, realise im being a total fool, yet cant seem to do anything to stop myself.

I resort to telling a few close friends who (thank goodness) talk some well deserved sanity into me. It's like i have my own personal reality checkers. lol

It has obviously degenrated down on me from my mother, only she's like a gazillion times worse and it's ghey becasue i end up ruining nice things for myself because i think they are ruined anyways...when really i should keep my mouth shut and invest in a rather large stress ball or something.

To be honest, there's something inparticular i really don't want to ruin just yet, becasue it's all good and nice and im having fun and don't have a reason to get all weirdo without a beardo at the moment.
I really am trying my hardest, and for the majority of the time i don't even think about. Then occasionally something will niggle in the back of my mind, then the awful feeling in your stomach sets in and before your know its like argggh!! get a grip woman.
Bleh...i don't know what to do about it...i guess it's sort of a birth defect and/or a neurotic tendancy that i'll just have to learn to control or ignore lol.
Some help with the controlling/ignoring part would be awesome though.

Personally I love most things about the 80's, although i was neither present or even a glint in my fathers eye for the duration of it.
The Films!!! Breakfast Club, Weird Science, Gregory's Girl, Mystic Pizza, Pretty Woman, Bill and Ted...

The Muisc!! Kim Wilde, Prince, David Bowie, Oingo Boingo, Frankie goes to Hollywood, Blondie...
(sure most of these didn't start in the 80's but that's not the point lol)

BUT! The bloody fashion was horrendous!
Shell suits, ra-ra skirts, puff ball skirts, Margret Thatcher and her paded shoulder suits, scrunch socks, hideous patterned everythings, leotards...to name a few!

That's only some of it, and its just feckin ghastly!!!!!
lol.
This only goes to prove that the fashion world is totally screwed up...becasue the only 'new trends' that come out of designers so called hard graft these days are re-work retro outfits becasue they havn't the imagination to create anything new and exciting.
Don't get me wrong i'm all for the 50's/ 60's kind of thing. But how can you possibly get away with and achieve succes out of something that was utterly awful in the first place.

I'd like to ask all you fashionistas out there, If your someone who lives for the brink of cutting edge fashion, daring to stand out and be different, (while trying to look gorgeous at the same time lol)...Why on earth are you all allowing the industry to do this to us??
I'm positive it's some secret joke amongst designers to make us all look stupid, becasue people are idotic enough to do it in the name of 'style'! Whatever that is these days.
We need to rid the world of these material disasters and as soon as possible!!
ARGH!!

Rant over ^_^

I havn't blogged in a while...and not sure i have anything to talk about...well i always do ha! so i'll just babble.

Tiredness
>.<
I so need and early night. But im having lots of fun, so sleep doesn't seem that neccessary until the morning lol.
Im listening to the 'Juno' soundtrack. It's weird but totally cool. Listen!! it'll make you think.
:D happy mooosic. happy mee!

I saw circus of horrors last week...a freak show. It was great!
There was a small guy with his bits in a Henry Hoover...sword walking, acrobatics, whips...etc
Annnnd went to London! (also totally shattering)
Visited the houses of parliament, and went on the eye. Food sitting on the thames was cool ^_^

Watched Sweeny Todd in cinema, was a little disappointed, However Mr. Depp was ravenous as ever. Ooo errrr!
And finally!!! went to the fair, if only riding the waltzer counts lol.

That's enough typing for now i think